Looking Through Mommy's Glasses
by LoveToTheCucumber
Summary: Pixiella is a hopeless romantic, while Cody is a typical male... What happens when they start to discuss sex? Can she keep him from muff diving, will Cody get some? Warning: Vulgarity! Pairing: Cody/Pixiella OC ...One-Shot... *Dedicated to Pixiella*


**Looking Through Mommy's Glasses**

Cody and Pixiella are sitting at home, talking while watching TV. Pixiella is forced to watch Cody's favorite TV-show, Beverly Hills 90210.  
One of the most famous sex scenes were about to begin, when Pixiella and Cody started to discuss sex.  
She thinks it's a little weird, cause they are best friends.

"Seriously, a finger in port can really be a partykiller!" Cody says, sounding almost upset.

"I don't mind? I think it's worse to swallow!"

"It can't be that bad? Average it's only a teaspoon… Did you know that only 1 % of the fluid is sperm cells? The rest consist of; water, bicarbonate, zinc, phosphate and C- vitamin!"

"No?"

"Okay… Well, I think the worst is when the girl wants to spoil you a little and then she doesn't know how to, so she just rushes towards Prince Albert, like there was a sale at the local mall! Don't you girls get that we want you to be gentle with it?!"

"Ok Cody? Did you know that when you fall in love, everybody but the person you fall in love with gets uglier? It's scientifically proven."

Cody start laughing: "That only happens for girls! We would fuck anybody even though we're in love, a hole is a hole!"

"God Cody, you're such a perv! You're not very romantic you know?"

Cody continues his own little conversation, acting like he didn't her Pixiella blaming him: "Even worse is when she takes the bald-headed yoghurt slinger in her mouth and she doesn't know how it should be treated! I really hate when they make the chopper tongue on it!"

"You love blows don't you?"

"Yeah? It's the best a man can get! You know, when it's done right… I love when they slurp and sound like they're getting choked!"

"What, why?!"

"Men love the thought about having a big dick and that it's too big for her to get to the root."

"Oh my god Cody, you're so grouse!" They both stop talking for a minute, but then Pixiella starts to get a little bit curious: "Do you make any rules for your girlfriend?"

"Nope… Nothing but she has to pleasure me 5 times a week… I can handle the rest on my own," Cody waves with his right hand.

Pixiella looks at Cody with disgust: "My rule is simple; If you forget a date, then I want flowers… And there will be no hanky panky that night!"

"You suck…"

"Oh, I do? A man wants to be seen as a king and he wants to be respected by everyone. Very old-fashioned, they clearly haven't moved since the Stone Age…"

"And it's not even a lie," Cody laughs louder.

"What, I was trying to offend you?"

"A small attack like that won't hurt my male pride."

"Okay, I really don't wanna talk about those things anymore, can we do something else please?"

"Sure… What about fucking?"

"CODY?!"

"What, I have needs you know!"

"I'm not your personal hump-rabbit! I'm your buddy…"

"Try to put fuck in front of that."

"Cody, I think I have to put on the mommy glasses and say stop!"

"Why are you always so boring?"

"Like calling me boring would make me sleep with you? Try a little harder, jess…"

"I think it's weird that we've never consummated our relationship?"

"Cody…"

"Yeah?"

"Shut up!"

"I wanna have sex!"

"Piss off already! I'm going to bed…" Pixiella goes to the bathroom to brush her teeth, she walks in her bedroom 5 min. later. Guess who she finds? A completely naked Cody lying in the middle of her bed.

"Cody!" she screams, starting to get real mad at him, she covers her eyes immediately.

"Come on babe, we can work this out… Together…" Cody says, getting up quickly.

She can feel his warm breathe against her ear and he whispers: "kneel down…"

She pushes him away: "Get the fuck away from me, I would never do that!"

"Then would you at least slap me a little, I have been a real naughty boy!" Cody says sounding really dirty and he hands her a whip of leather with studs.

"Get out…"

"Can I eat you then?!" Cody makes his puppy eyes and his trembling lower lip.

"NO!"

Cody begs her throughout the night till she eventually gives in to his hot man-body.  
They try ever possible position they know and she gets to suck, while Cody gets to eat both pussy and ass.

"We're officially become fuck-buddies," Cody says raising his eyebrow.

"Mmm, let's go have shag in the public!"

"Or we could do it in the bathtub?"

"Or on the kitchen table?"

"Which one do you prefer?"

"I don't care, just take me now!"

**Okay, this was supposed to be funny, as you can see there's no actual plot!  
- So please review to let me know if it turned out well or not (:**

**I want to dedicate this to Pixiella, a wonderful author and the funniest person!**

**(If anyone is a bit confused about the story's name, it means; looking through a mother point of view, which means making the right decisions/ doing the right thing…)**

**Wanna know what inspired me to write this?  
You're not gonna believe it, articles from the Danish M S N xD!  
Fx. the whole part where Cody tells about men liking the thought of a big penis and women getting choked because of it, that was actually a test made in Denmark…  
Most of their discussion is based on things, which are scientifically proven in Denmark…  
I find that fact kind of amusing xD….**

**Well, hope you liked it and please let me know if you did or didn't!**

**I'll be making series of Cody one shot stories soon…  
So keep updated :D**

**See ya!  
**


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